Show Me What You Got

One warm summer afternoon, I was having this great Nerf battle with my then six year old son Matthew. Armed with the latest Nerf technology, we chased each other around the yard and in and out of the house. I was in hot pursuit of him when he exhausted his supply of soft, plastic arrows. Ducking inside the house he ran up the first flight of steps and onto the first landing. That’s where I caught and cornered him. Assured of my successful victory, I said to my diminutive captive; “Well, what are gonna do now kid?”. Without skipping a beat he said; “Dis!” and preceded to whap me across the head with his hard, plastic weaponry. The surprise blow sent his former captor down the stairs, landing in a humble heap with a cut across his nose. Matt and I shared a laugh and the small nerf conflict came to a close. Except for the “war stories” told by my son to the rest of the family! This “show me what you got moment” left a significant mark (quite literally) on his Dad and got me to thinking.

It struck me, (pun intended) that success is too focused on me (how I look), while significance is focused or keyed on another (how they are). Significance is concerned with the fact that my every word leaves an impression, and every action an impact. My steps are measured out by my kids to see if they can step in them. Does my stride allow for their stride, their ability to stretch out their walk? Or will my pace frustrate them as I worry over my personal success? The truth is simple, our fathering produces ripples, and from the moment our eyes open in the morning, the things we focus on will be felt by our children. It has been said that “the best producer of tomorrow is today”, stating in essence that we build future heritage with the life we live today. The connections of our lives mortared together by the Father, establishes foundational pilings, on which we can create a span of generational covenant. These relational memories of truth, fleshed out in the service of the King, offer a slideshow of remembrances that tether our kids to that same Kingdom covenant.

Significant moments means leaving our agenda behind. Letting the grass get a little longer as we play catch or have a water fight on a hot summer day. I could become successful—do all the right things and miss the core of who my children are. Right relationships are the significance marrow of any family, the core of establishing future generations. I must lead in the way of relationships, I am the liaison leader, modeling solid, healthy and life giving connections between family members. The picture is one of the Father, the ultimate relationship mover and shaker. His covenant is the significance glue, the bond of love that fuses us together with His son.

Blessings,
Jay

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© 2008 Jay Cookingham - All rights reserved.
Jay Cookingham recently published two articles for the God's Way series. You can visit his home page at http://Jaycookingham.com

This column is used with permission.