Making Memories

by Brian Bill
Published October 2, 2007

(Written on May 29, 2004)

On this Memorial Day weekend, let’s reflect on the importance of remembering. The purpose of the first Memorial Day observed in America was to honor the fallen of the Civil War. The reason behind establishing Memorial Day is because we forget so easily. For many of us, this weekend just signifies the start of the summer season as we get our grills going and plan our vacations. But we must remember those who have sacrificed their lives for us, and we must never forget those still serving around the world today.

In a famous Memorial Day speech, before there was such a thing as Memorial Day, Abraham Lincoln remembered all the lives lost at Gettysburg when he said: “It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced…”

I’m grateful for all those who gave their lives in service to our country, and as I look around, it’s readily apparent that the work is still unfinished. In addition, as I see the spiritual landscape of our country, I wonder what it will take to finish the task that God has entrusted to parents.

The Bible continually emphasizes the importance of our memory when it comes to our spiritual lives because God knows that we have an uncanny ability to forget Him. Here’s just a sampling: “Remember all the commandments of the Lord” (Numbers 15:39); “Remember what you used to be” (Deuteronomy 15:15); “They failed to remember and became stiff-necked and rebellious” (Nehemiah 9:17); “Remember your creator while you’re young” (Ecclesiastes 12:1); “Remember Jesus Christ, risen from the dead” (2 Timothy 2:8).

Obviously, God wants us to invoke our memories. He knows what will happen when we don’t remember Him. And, when we don’t remember Him, not only will we lose out, but so will our children. In the sixth chapter of Deuteronomy, we see four main ways to develop family memories. Much like a chair that requires 4 legs in order to properly support someone; God has created four pillars for parents.

Our first responsibility is to LEARN IT. We see this in verses 2: “…by keeping all His decrees and commands…” If we want to pass along memories of trust to our kids, and our grandkids, then we first have to learn how to trust God for ourselves. Part of trusting Him is by taking Him seriously and knowing what He says in His Word.

The second pillar is to LIVE IT. Verse 3 is very clear: “Hear, O Israel, and be careful to obey…” It’s one thing to learn something; it’s another thing all together to live it out. It’s not enough to just know information – it must lead to personal transformation.

The third leg of the stool is to TEACH IT: “Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up” (Deuteronomy 6:7). The word “impress” literally means to “be sharp, precise, and to the point.” We are not to just throw our faith out as an option for our kids. Rather, we are to take it so seriously that we look for ways to precisely pass along what we are learning. The task of teaching is a never-ending, full-time assignment.

We come now to the fourth parenting principle: PROTECT IT. God knows that once we experience Him and see Him work, we not only have the propensity to forget, we can also think that we’re self-sufficient. In verses 10-11, God looks ahead to the time when His people will finally arrive in the Promised Land. They will have things like flourishing cities, furnished houses, and an abundance of food and refreshments. God knows that these “things” may zap their spiritual vitality and that they will lose their sense of trust as a people. In verse 12 He says: “Be careful that you do not forget the Lord…”

Don’t forget what Jesus has done for you. Have you ever made a decision to put your full faith and total trust in Christ? Have you engaged your will and received the greatest gift of all time by asking the Savior to save you from your sins? You see, you can’t give your kids what you don’t have. You can only pass along what has first entered your own life. Most Americans want their kids to learn about God and to have faith in Him. But, if that’s what we truly value, then we’ll make sure we develop faith in our own lives.

Samuel Taylor Coleridge had a dinner guest one time who was an atheist. During the meal his guest expounded the virtues of freedom of choice and how religion prevented people from being truly free. He was especially upset with how parents train their children in the faith, claiming that kids should be free to believe what they want without any outside influence from their parents.

After dinner, Coleridge got up and asked his friend to come outside with him to take a look at his garden. Coleridge was known as an expert gardener so his guest was expecting to see beautiful flowers, sculpted shrubbery and flowering plants. Instead, he saw weeds everywhere and out-of-control vines and general disorder. Everything was overgrown. The atheist look puzzled and said, “This is your garden? What happened?” Coleridge responded: “Well, I just took your advice. I wouldn’t want to impose myself upon these young vines – I just let them grow like they wanted to.”

Parents, what kind of garden are you growing? Let’s remember to honor our fallen this weekend and let’s finish that which has been left unfinished by learning, living, teaching and protecting…in our world, in our country, and in our homes.

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