Boys To Men

by Brenda Black
Published February 14, 2009

I watched my boy ride an old bucking tractor, awkwardly unbalanced by a large round bale. It made this mother’s heart skip a beat. Pride in watching him do the job and handle it was worth the rapid coronary rate. Over the past year especially, I’ve caught glimpses of rites of passage in my oldest son’s life. It has become obvious he is turning into a man.

I noticed this past fall as we hunted together that he took the lead and I became follower. He passed me this spring in height and is now taller than me. I take jars to him to open since he is now far stronger. Most of the time he chauffeurs me, opens my door, fills the car with gas and does the drive-thru banking.

Here lately, he gets as many job offers as I do. I like to listen to him handle business over the phone. He sounds so grown up. When did that happen? People trust him and respect him. That is just what a mother is after.

Just last summer, he got a permit to drive. In a couple of months, he’ll be out on the road solo. Then in just two more years, he’ll be off to college. I would be completely excited about that except for the fact that there are still days when he acts more like the child than the adult. That’s when I am vividly reminded my job is not nearly over. There is much to teach and as much to learn with another man in the house who is not yet quite grown.

I wonder if that is how God looks at us – always a work in progress. He sees the growth and counts the accomplishments. He measures the distance we’ve come and knows the potential we possess. The Lord is omniscient and wise in his understanding that no matter how old we are, we still have lessons to learn. He gently instructs and guides us. He is patient and forgiving. He counsels us and encourages us and chastises when necessary. He is the perfect parent with children who never outgrow the need to be parented. How he must tire of our failings and immaturity. Surely he grows weary of disciplining us over and over in the same problem area. Yet he continues to love us and call us to himself. He never forsakes us.

A perfect parent who does it perfectly is parenting a family of imperfect people all over the planet. How exhausting! He does not grow tired. His mercies are new every morning. He listens all night long. He dries every tear, even when it is cried for selfish reasons. God is remarkable in his ability to set a standard, expect us to rise to meet it, and completely forgive us when we fail miserably.

On the days when I am pleased and proud of my children for the people they are becoming, I remember that it is purely because of the grace of God. He has helped his pitiful children rear children of their own and not mess it up too badly. He has blessed us with wisdom and given us indescribable love to hang in there when it hasn’t been easy. Oh, you better believe, there are days, when I think about early retirement. I want to quit and give the job to someone better qualified. Then I see another sign in my sons that gives me a glimpse of things eternal. I remember who is really in charge and helping me every step of the way. I am reminded once again that he has given me the greatest responsibility and has equipped me for the task completely if I will just trust in his wisdom.

Theodore Roosevelt once said, “What we have a right to expect of the American boy is that he shall turn out to be a good American man. The boy can best become a good man by being a good boy – not a goody-goody boy, but just a plain good boy... ‘Good,’ in the largest sense, should include whatever is fine, straightforward, clean, and manly.”

Filling my Abba Daddy’s shoes is much too big of a job. Walking hand in hand with him, the perfect parent, seems a lot more comfortable. I am praying, with God’s help, my husband and I can see this job through. I know we will be blessed through every rite of passage as we watch our boys turn into men.

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